Welcoming The Year-End ... Again!

Alhamdulillah.
First draft of the proposal has been submitted for my supervisor kind review, which means now I have plenty of time to spend with my loved ones and off course its a payback time for some updates on my blog after it has been abandoned for so many weeks before the draft have to be edited for defense session.

Alhamdulillah too, that this year-end bring us some rezeki. And off course with the extra rezeki,  we manage to get ourselves new laptops to enhance our work quality. The husband just bought himself a new Apple Macbook while I just replace my 4 years old Compaq with new Acer which comes with newly installed Windows 8 (which currently I'm adapting myself into and get all the functions familiarized) and further to that, I am just more than happy that all of our plan for 2012 are progressing really well.

Moving to motherhood, I must now admit that the day during completing my Degree and battling with one child is way much different than handling 2 kids as it is now. Even the difference is only by one child but the rotation of routine get 100 times crazier now when I am in the progress of completing the Master  and handling 2 crazily active children at home. I am not shame to admit that sometimes there has been an emotionally ups and down when it comes to managing home and these 2 kids for it is not an easy task even that I’m staying at home. It is the most tiring yet fulfilling job a mom had to face. Sometimes I just wish that these kids will grow up faster so that I don’t have to face the same routine with the same tantrum every day. But in the end, it just touch me to the bottom of my heart when every night,  right before I put these kids off to bed, kakak will offer me a good massage on my foot while little Saif offers me a good warm hug as a sign of thanking me and appreciation of what I did for him during day. How blessed I am to have them in my life. I am lucky to receive so much love from these kids am I? (Not to mention being pampered too much by my husband)

Looking forward to 2013, there is not much expectation to put on as I think this coming year is all about the continuation of what has been done in 2012. One thing for sure, I will,  Inshaa Allah, to put a full blast for 2013 so that it would be much better year than 2012.

To be able to love more, to give more, to live more and off course to forgive and redha for any circumstances.

I LOVE MY LIFE AND I LOVE BEING ME- nho

He just can't get his hands off from this Macbook. Working all the way.

Getting myself familiarized

The best pose he could give while eating ice-cream @Colmar de Tropicale. Sangat mengada!

My much love angels at their most adored lepak spot; Kedai Upin Ipin in Bangi.

The Lost Soul

She was here
She was lend temporarily by The Lord to support me to stand
We spend some valuable time as mother and daughter
Even at some points we quarreled
But it always back to her where I find the calm when others try to bother.

She was one tough figure
For it was never easy to become a single mother raised up a daughter
When the world keep oppressing in every possible angle, she turned to me as motivation for her to go further, for her to aim higher
She had me and it’s suffice
For I am her little angel even all I saw was only her sour face
Over her tiring work schedule
For having to support me all alone
Without any additional hands to hold and hear her exhausting soul.

I know I owe her so much
For making me who I am today
I love her and it’s beyond measure
For she is the real mother, the real love
The one who struggle so much in her life
Only to prove to others that she was a one sturdy build
Who needs no one for her to lean against, even at the sappy cloudy day
Or even when her step has gone astray.

I miss her dearly
It has been 3 years since we met
It has been 3 years since I kissed her forehead
It has been 3 years since I hugged her tight
Before she was taken eternally to meet the One who Create.

You are the purest love of all
You are the angel of my own version
You’ll be loved and missed dearly above all.

The five years old girl inside me always longed for her and hold on to our great day at White Castle and McDonald eating burgers together every time at the day when she received her monthly pay cheque. Even the world couldn’t pay what she had sacrificed for me. May He place her in His mighty protection and blessings.  Al-Fatihah and may The Almighty tells her how much I miss her dearly-nho

I Loathe You

I miss you

Well I know you knew

Even when we never met since then

Yet the feeling is so true

Missing you is bitter

Missing you is sweet

Missing you is mixed feeling

Missing you is fluctuating

We just know that we don’t need each other; anymore

We moved on to a different space

Meeting new people

Meeting new life

When you finally met the one who you can call as ‘wife’

Yet the memory is here to follow

Never fail to chase us in a sorrow

Missing you never mean that I want you

Missing you never mean that I need you

Missing you never mean that I still long for you

It is just the memory that bring us back to the life where we want to forget

Delete and finally move on on a different pace

But sometimes it just worth remembering for

So that I know what type of person that I used to ignore

I miss us but I loathe you. -nho

My Another Turn Point (I Just Love Making More Life DeTour)

I miss blogging so much. Guess since I have started getting back to school, my time and commitment has somehow being divided with other important things which cause lesser time to get down with the writing and generating ideas. As this post is written, I am about to make another turn in my life. I have started half of semester in master program in one public university nearby my house and somehow, all the sudden, last week I started to think of switching the courses and off course dropping from that public university which I currently enroll and going back to my old private university in Cyberjaya. Well, it kind of a challenging decision to make but for me, it is worthy other than spending 1 or 2 years of your precious time doing something which not your passion. It is not that the existing course is not good enough but rather to say that my interest is more in doing things on my own and be creative with my own directions but off course be bide by certain rules and restrictions. I am thinking of going back to MMU and this time around doing the thesis in Organizational Behavior Effects towards Change Acceptance and Stress in Organization. I am still working on the proposal right now and in high pray for I will manage to get it done for submission before November ends. 

If you ask me on the reason, I might say that it is after I started my economics class when all the sudden I found out that I was in a wrong place with a wrong people. LOL! Truth saying, I had enough for getting a cracking head at all the times when the equations started to turn wacko with all the derivation and crazy advance calculus. It is at one definite point in class that I realize my passion has been all along with management and writing and the question of how do I get the equal utility of doing both arise, so the answer would be going back to MMU and signing up for Managament program and get down with all the reading and writing. But I am still in a prayer that The Almighty will firm my decision and actions towards accomplishing this goal no matter how hard it would be. After all, great things don’t fall from the sky in a silver platter. One should work really hard and smart to earn something in life. Alhamdulillah, so far the husband has been continuously supportive towards any of my decision regarding my study (perhaps because I will have more time at home with him and the kids since I don’t have to attend any evening classes since Thesis mode in MMU offers no classes other than a normal frequent meeting with supervisor) and I am so glad that he is in a full understanding of me in pursuing my education.

I think that’s about it for now. I need to get down with further reading for the proposal. InsyaAllah, if He allows, more write up will be written soon as the life progressing. -nho

My much love and life inspirations which I shall trade with nothing in life (Incl. Tasha who snapped this)

Discover Kuching, Sarawak

At first I refused to accompany the husband when he started to propose me to travel with him as he required to go Lundu (Lundu is a small town with 3 hours driving from Kuching which located near the border between Sarawak and Kalimantan) for his Qurban event; as I am having the Microeconomics paper on Tuesday and need more time to do some revision, but towards the end, I guess this is the opportunity to explore East Malaysia as I always fall in love with its nature, culture and friendly people.

On Saturday, we rushed with our bag pack to the airport as the arrangement were made at the very last minute and as usual, Tasha and Saif couldn’t be more thrilled to travel buy ERL and bus to LCCT. We stayed in Dormani Hotel, which nearby to Masjid Bahagian and took the opportunity to ride on penambang across the Sarawak River to have mee kolok and laksa Sarawak, also bought tones of delicious kek lapis from the nearby shop runs by the local. There’s nothing more that I could say about this trip even after several trip to East Malaysia as facilitator and Assistant Project Manager, there’s nothing like discovering it with the loved ones. (I noticed that my ideas in pouring words has become lesser since I started my class; must have been thinking too much on my paper and not to mention its pressure). So here’s some pieces of me and my kids enjoyment while discovering Kuching! –nho.